Okay, so I was reading up on some literary analysis processes as one does, because I like seeing the processes that go behind that kind of stuff. And I came across this really interesting paragraph that only hit me now.
The thing was long and old and I'm sure not much in it is siteable, but one of the posters made a really interesting point. The thread itself was on the upswing of discourse in current fandom and how people nit pick for problems in all media to the point where they can no longer enjoy medium. How this problem seems to affect media that includes diverse representation so much more that media that doesn't even try.
That people hype up things like Steven Universe apparently (never watched it myself) and She Ra, and just all these other cartoons and stuff that make an effort, but they hype it up so much that they can't enjoy once it actually comes out, all because of one little flaw. But that's getting off topic a little.
They brought up that in schools, literary analysis is taught to everyone. Theg break things apart and show you the patterns and the steps to get here, and these people who'd done in depth courses where they did that breaking apart and scrutinizing thing found that they couldn't enjoy media anymore. Because everything followed a pattern and so everything was predictable, nothing was fun.
I've noticed I have have the same problem, both when I consume media, and with my dumb fanfiction (not because fanfiction is dumb, but because MY specific dumb fanfiction) I'm trying to create.
It's not "this is an emotional scene that will be fun to write" anymore. It's all "Inciting incident" this and "turning point" that. I've made the writing process a series of steps I have to follow, a paint by numbers but nowhere near as satisfying and so I've taken the joy of the process away from myself. This is why I still have fun working on one-shots, but my WIPs have all been so hard to work on past, like, the second chapter.
It's no fun reading a book while looking for flaws like you're going to write a book report on it. It's no fun writing a story where you're just moving things from predetermined point A to predetermined point B. It's fun writing the scene where old friends finally reunite and promise to be their for each other and help each other no matter what tries to come between them. It's not so much fun writing pinch point 1 where the protagonist gains some form of help or information necessary to the plot.
I'm sure that planning method works for some people, maybe even most people. Hell for like two years I've thought it was working for me because it meant I could plot out a detailed story in just a couple hours, stories I would never work on, because I'd bore myself to death trying.
There's definitely a balance to be found here, and finding it is probably going to take me a while, but if I'm right about this it's worth trying so I get to enjoy my favourite hobby again.
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